Hello...My name is Amanda...

My husband of 9 years took his own life May 30th 2009.

He left this behind..I wanted to share it.

It was about him and how he was feeling...

He suffered for many years with bi-polar and depression...

My children are full of laughter
My Amanda is full of spite
My family is so amazing
Yet I  always full of strife

Why is my head always spinning
In the opposite ways of smiles
I wish I could control myself
But I fuck up all the times

I wish I could rip it wide open
And let the bad thoughts go away
But I can't so I am stuck painting a smile every FN day

God lord or whatever the fuck you are
Just let it be heard
I am tired of hurting the ones
That love me the most
Why can't My love be heard

Thanks for reading....

May 2010 bring you peace, love and joy !!!

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