Casual modeling, cooking, reading, photography, watching t.v, listening to music

Mostly fantasy, scary, comedy

Everything. If it carries a tune I like it :)

I LOVE to read. I will read almost anything and everything. Except detective novels, I can't seem to get into them for some reason..

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You can call me Puddles :) I am 20 and I live in Canada. I have suffered with panic attacks since I was 16. More recently I have begun to experiance DP/DR (depersonalization/derealization)
Neither of these conditions are easy to live with. I dont know if the DP/DR is permanent or not, but I'm hoping to make it a chapter I can close and move on with in my life. I know I will always have anxiety, but I also know I am strong enough to live with/around it.

I am an ordinary person, just like anyone else. I have a wide range of interests,I'm friendly and I like animals. I find it hard to explain to those around me that I have a mental illness and sometimes I just can't be the person they expect of me. People have come and gone in my life as a result. I find it forever difficult to explain myself when I'm "acting weird" because of the anxiety. People Look at you and when they see nothing is PHYSICALLY wrong, it is hard for them to except anything is wrong at all.

People ask me sometimes how I can appear so physically well and have so much hurt sometimes. I try to explain it like this: "if you had a physical illness inside you like, say, a tumor. Nobody can see that right? At least not untill it gets really really bad. Wouldn't you want to go and get treatment and understanding that you need to fix that problem BEFORE it gets really bad? It's the same thing with mental illness. You don't see it in someone sometimes before its way to late. We need treatment and care and understanding just like you, before it gets really bad"

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